humour – Page 7 – The PolyBlog

↓

JAVASCRIPT IS DISABLED. Please enable JavaScript on your browser to best view this site.

JotD: Obituary for Pop N. Fresh (PWH00025)

June 10 2025

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71. Known to friends as Brown-n-Serve, Fresh was an avid gardener and tennis player. Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Aunt Jemima, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Skippy. The graveside was piled high with flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man who “never knew how much he was kneaded.” Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with many turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes — conned by those who buttered him up. Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model for millions. Fresh is survived by his second wife. They have two children and another bun in the oven. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

JotD: Kinder (PWH00041)

June 9 2025

No matter how kind you are, German children are kinder.

JotD: Missionaries (PWH00019)

May 30 2025

Two missionaries in Africa get apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, build a huge fire under it, and leave them there. A few minutes later, one of the missionaries starts to laugh uncontrollably. The other missionary can’t believe it! He says, “What’s wrong with you? We’re being boiled alive! They’re gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?” The other missionary says, “I just peed in the soup!”

JotD: Donald and Minnie (PWH00014)

May 29 2025

Donald Duck and Minnie Mouse were up in a hotel room and decided that they wanted to have sex. Well, the first thing Minnie asks is “Do you have a condom?” Donald says “No”. Minnie tells Donald that if he doesn’t get a condom, they can’t have sex, so she suggests that Donald go buy one. She says that maybe they sell them at the front desk. Donald proceeds to go downstairs and gets to the front desk. He asks the hotel clerk if they sell condoms. The clerk says, “Yes, we do,” and pulls one out from under the desk and gives it to Donald. “Would you like me to put that on your bill?” Donald says, “NO! WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, SOME KIND OF PERVERT?”

JotD: Lawyers vs. vampires (PWH00060)

May 28 2025

What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Once you die, the vampire stops sucking your blood.

↑