Maybe it’s the current pandemic climate, a strange combination of massive change overall against a backdrop of ongoing “no change” day-to-day. Maybe it’s the fact that it is 1:30 a.m. in the morning and I’m still awake, and I’m choosing to type instead of drifting off to sleep. Maybe it’s that I’m sitting in a basement full of boxes around my new office setup, and I haven’t quite organized everything yet. Or maybe it’s simply the fact that I just finished watching S2 of Jessica Jones where much of her backstory was about feeling untethered in her world.
But untethered seems like a great word to me tonight. It isn’t about being unconnected, although there is an element of that. It is about being adrift, untethered to a True North sense of direction.
There is a phrase from the US Declaration of Independence about holding certain truths to be self-evident. And in our current pandemic world, some of those truths are not quite as firm as they might have been. Foundations are not quite as stable as we perhaps thought they were, or we live in more shades of grey than we originally thought.
And yet, as I hit the half-way point of the year, and thinking about things like goals and what I want to be doing with my time, I feel like much of it is about choice. As it always is, of course, with an act of choice, an act of free will even, being the most fundamental element of creating a new reality.
That each day we wake, we rise, and we start making more choices that shape our reality. And perhaps that’s the source of my unease. That my sense of “choice” has been missing from my repertoire.
I feel like life, in all its colours, is happening TO me these days rather than life being something I create with my choices.
And I need to reclaim it.
More importantly, I CHOOSE to reclaim it. I will choose which anchor points I to consider tethering myself to, even if only for a day.
And so, with that thought, I am going to commit myself to a daily choice. A daily affirmation of a life chosen, not life simply lived. And perhaps my choice is as simple as that…
Today I choose to choose.
Let’s see what I choose tomorrow. What are you choosing?