Just over a year ago, I did my annual personal “goal-setting”. Many of the comments I received on my goals basically suggested I was either (a) trying to do too much or (b) not prioritizing family high enough. I do appreciate the comments, but neither are really applicable to me or my personal situation.
First, the whole point of doing this is to be really ambitious, to use a combination of some of the techniques in the “goal guru / time management” industry. And so I am not trying to do all of them. Maybe not even most of them. Really what I am doing is listing goals and creating the list so that I can use it to remind myself of my goals, to take a greater step than most in actually writing them down as well as to get them out of my head and on paper so I don’t have to try and just remember them. Anytime I want them, they’re there for easy review.
Second, suggesting someone prioritize family “higher” is an easy comment, but is actually quite simplistic in concept. No matter what anyone does for family, someone will always say “make them a priority”. Of course, they’re a priority. But I also don’t want to be the equivalent of the stereotype of a stressed out parent (usually portrayed as a mom) who only lives vicariously through their family, who loses their own identity or subsumes their own life under that that of their children. That might make a “green” personality happy in the short-term, but I’m a primary blue — I’m always going to want some of own analytical time, for instance. Just how I’m wired…and if others want to follow an unconscious script that tells them family is always the “right answer”, that’s their choice. But I know better. I love my family. But I’m useless to them if that’s all I bring to the table or expect them to be my whole life. So I need to make sure some of those other areas are going too. But family is also not a “to do” item, nor will I treat them as such.
How did I do in 2011? Well, let’s see. First and foremost, I am happy with the fact that my approach included a new colour wheel that resonates with me in terms of psychology, personality, etc. However, it wasn’t entirely successful and I have a slightly tweaked approach for 2012 that I’m going to try that thinks in terms of just the four colours (no sub categories), and “themes” + a storyline. Almost like “branding my year” in a way so I can tell myself the story better. More info on that in future posts.
Second, something that wasn’t really on the list is something that sucked time like nobody’s business. My family and I moved homes — not a great distance from where we were, but huge upgrades on quality of life in a bunch of areas. But it pretty much killed three to five months of the year, maybe a bit more.
So let’s see how I did on the various items I had in my posts from last February / March.
| Getting organized | |
| Being organized | Maintaining to do lists, etc. — worked well at start of year but by end of year, I was drifting a bit…have now converted over to using Evernote and it seems promising so far. |
| House | I was expecting to do a lot of work on the old house and we did — but different work, work designed to help it SELL! And we bought a new house requiring a lot less work. Lots of new stuff to be done, but starting to sort itself out. |
| Finances | Wanted to do better planning and we did, both with strategic financial planner, wills, etc. But still work to be done that should have already been done on moving investments around, better insurance coverage, etc. |
| Computers | Finished and started using website, reorganized some of the computer backups etc. |
| Garden | Wasn’t a priority, nothing happened |
| Cottage | Wasn’t a priority, nothing happened |
| Design a house | Wasn’t a priority, but buying the new place helped us articulate what we were really looking for in terms of rooms, layout, location, etc. |
| Relationships | |
| Fatherhood | Mostly about father vs. husband vs. individual, I didn’t do as well as I would have liked on the “father/husband” front in terms of carrying my share of the load — Andrea still does most of the pre-bedtime prep stuff. |
| Husband | Plus we haven’t made the time for “spousal” time, and most of our conversations are still about Jacob…need more date nights. Still supporting Andrea’s educational efforts, which is good. |
| Individual | Not doing as much after Jacob goes to bed either, a little too much TV watching of late. |
| Family | Hardly saw my family last year, which is not what I hoped for. |
| Body and Soul | |
| Physical | Massage time down, Prevacid steady, eyeglasses replaced, got new doctor, but need to find new dentist, I became a greater couch potato, developed blood pressure problems, didn’t get new orthotics, no golfing, didn’t compensate on charitable giving. Plus other new stuff showing up on the health risk front. |
| Astro Pontiac | Need to get more organized for supporting Stephan on this astronomy proposal. |
| Figure out spiritual beliefs | I don’t really know what I believe anymore, and should really figure this out a bit more. |
| Ethics | Created personal rules / principles but not really sure I’m living them. |
| Weight | No real change |
| Meditation | Did nothing |
| Martial Arts | Did nothing |
| Giving blood | Tried to get this organized in late December but coordinator screwed up donation date, need to rebook |
| Learning | |
| Online courses | Did nothing |
| Personal interest courses | Did nothing |
| Further studies | Did nothing |
| Learning sign language | Did nothing |
| Use own telescope | Did nothing |
| Learn photography | Did nothing |
| Learn to drive a standard transmission | Did nothing |
| Social | |
| MMMMM outings | Did nothing |
| Remembrance Day / Corn roast | Wiped out by moving |
| Coffee with Amanda / Hockey with Seb / Brunches | Pretty much a wash out. |
| Book reviews | 28 all up and converted |
| Movie reviews | Did nothing |
| Ebook collection, pruning paper | Nothing |
| Billboard music | Nothing |
| Learn to knit | Nothing |
| Play Pai Gow | Nothing |
| Movie weekend | Nothing |
| List of top books | List compiled |
| Creativity | |
| Business model for publishing | Lots of research, looking good |
| Writing | Blog only |
| Capital Crime | Nothing for new year |
| HR guide (employees) | Started posting |
| HR guide (employers) | Preliminary |
| Gods novel outline | Nothing |
| Cookbook | Nothing |
| Recipe nights | Nothing |
| Career | |
| Mentoring, coaching | Some 1:1, some group |
| Focused content | Not really, still main stuff |
| Day job vs. SR / SORO | Caught up in SORO, not able to extricate myself |
| French | Nothing |
| Presentation | Continued learning series |
| Leadership | |
| Teaching role | Continued learning series, some blogging on tech issues (SEO) |
| Municipal issues | Nothing |
| Local theatre | Nothing |
| Windmill to tilt at | Nothing really, some blogging |
| Travel – England | Nothing |
| Travel – Territories | Nothing |
| Travel – Grand Canyon | Nothing |
| Travel – Galapagos | Nothing |
| Travel – Ortona | Nothing |
| Travel – Iceland | Nothing |
| Travel – Scotland, Ireland | Nothing |
| Travel – Aust/NZ | Nothing |
| Travel – Fiji | Nothing |
| Travel – Egypt | Nothing |
| Travel – Antarctica | Nothing |
| Other (Miscellaneous) | |
| Red Tie to web | Nothing |
| Garage sale | Nothing |
| Porch swing | Nothing, but moving reprioritized |
| Basketball hoop | Nothing, but moving reprioritized |
| Bicycle setup | Nothing, but moving reprioritized |
| Car insurance claim | Nothing |
| ETFs | Nothing, but moving pre-empted it |
In the end, some progress, some slippage. My only real concern for the future is where there are whole categories essentially that I did nothing on, indicating that there is a sub-area that I am relatively ignoring. Part of that is the way I set my priorities, and some of it is the way I remind myself what to focus on. I think the new approach for 2012 (themes, storyline) will help counteract that…at least, I hope it will! Stay tuned!
